Anti Claus Is Comin’ To Town

I always enjoy the Christmas season, even though I’m an unreconstructed agnostic. The lights, sounds, foods and spiritual ceremonies all have their own unique appeal, taken in good measure. Sure, many in this country go way overboard sometimes, but that’s just human nature…I define how much of the hoopla I enjoy to suit myself, and neither expect others to share all of my tastes nor share all of theirs. There are plenty of folks who get carried away by the over-commercialization of the holiday, while others’ religious practices frown on celebrating the holiday at all. I’m happy seeking my own balance.

I appreciate the positive Christian themes of renewal, hope, good fellowship and charity as much as I do the older pagan representations celebrating Yule and the winter solstice in various iterations depending on their origins in old Germanic, Norse or Gothic cultures.

Of the lesser known Christmas traditions, my favorite comes down to us from this last, most commonly associated with Austria. I’m speaking, of course, of the Krampus.

The portrayal of our Americanized Santa Claus, traditionally bringing gifts to good boys and girls and lumps of coal to the bad ones always seemed to me to be just a wee bit one-sided and oversimplified.

I mean, really? Some kid’s rotten all year long and his or her only punishment from Saint Nicholas is a lump of coal?

I never quite thought that was fair, frankly. I’ve personally known plenty of little fiends over time that were mean to animals, bullied their peers, and were guilty of all manner of unpleasant things that clearly warranted worse treatment than just getting a lump of coal in their Christmas stockings. When I eventually got online some years ago, though,  it wasn’t long before I discovered the Krampus, and that finally put life back in balance for me.

If you recall your folklore, the original Saint Nicholas was a bishop and thus about as far from wicked as you could ask for. He was known for giving presents to the kids, especially poor ones, who had been good while driving the devil away by admonishing children to behave decently. Human nature being what it is, his good advice and example weren’t always taken to heart. You and I both know that truly nasty kids would only sneer at a kindly old man with what would seem to them a goody-goody message, so legend provides us with a sidekick who’d be up to the task…enter the Krampus.

This frightening creature accompanies Saint Nick on his rounds, ready to scourge bad kiddies with birch switches or even carry off really naughty ones in a sack to be eaten later or cast into the Pit. With his horns, long red tongue and cloven hoofs he makes a hideous sight, guaranteed to scare the worst kids straight.

Ya gotta like this guy…not only does he serve a useful purpose, but he was suppressed in fascist Austria in the 30s, so he can’t be all bad. Besides, he seems to have an eye for attractive young ladies…in modern Krampusnacht festivals they are often singled out for a friendly swat from his switch.

So you’ve been warned, kids, I suggest you be on your best behavior if you encounter this fellow. Be good, mind your manners…and for goodness’ sake don’t forget to donate to worthy causes at this special time of the year!

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About Glenn Horowitz

I'm a 20 year civil courier pilot, retired by multiple sclerosis. From summer of 2011 until December 2013 my efforts went mostly to my first blog, Get Glenn Mobile, to raise the funds needed to convert my Honda Element for wheelchair access and end my virtual housebound confinement. This was realized just after Christmas 2013 when I was able to acquire a superb X-WAV Element, already modified for my use. Though the original goal wasn't met, what was raised, plus my Honda, plus the proceeds of the sale from my mother's car were enough to make it happen. It's an amazing story in itself! Now, after my release from homebound prison, I can augment the journalistic work I'm doing for the American Daily Herald by getting out in public, talking with people, perhaps even getting some media attention to explain why someone as disabled as I am knows these unfunded entitlement programs like Social Security and its 'disability insurance' are bogus and do more harm than good, and in fact why the whole welfare/warfare state is contrived to keep the gravy train rolling for those who benefit while they drain our resources and eat out our substance. Why 'public education' is really public INDOCTRINATION that's become a meat grinder destroying our youth and our future. Why the fiat currency foisted on us by the Federal Reserve for a hundred years has destroyed the dollar and will without doubt cause its collapse. On and on the list goes, and I want to talk with the world about these vital matters. Please visit my new blog, 'Liberty On Wheels' at http://libertyonwheels.com/ if you're interested in learning more!

Posted on December 20, 2011, in Fun Stuff, General Stuff and tagged , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. Leave a comment.

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